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Bryan Lunduke @BryanLunduke

If you had a nice chess set...

And all of the pieces were Linux-themed...

What would each piece be? (ex: Tux as the Pawn, Stallman as the Rook, etc.)


Linux Chess Set:

King: Linus Torvalds!

Queen: Stallman? LOL

Bishops: Alan Cox, Andrew Morton

Knights: Miguel de Icaza, Lennart Poettering (ha!)

Rooks: Marc Ewing, Mark Shuttleworth

Pawns: Tux Penguins

@miwilc @msh @BryanLunduke Oh yeah? Well, the white pieces are:

King: Bill Gates
Queen: Steve Jobs
Knights: Steve Wozniak & Paul Allen
Rooks: Steve Ballmer (crumbs, lots of people called Steve!) & Tim Cook
Bishops: Nathan Myrvhold & John Sculley
Pawns: The End Users

@ej @msh @BryanLunduke

Lol. Looks like we found the next movie to make.

@DistroJunkie @BryanLunduke @miwilc hmm...both worthy rooks too 🤔

Maybe the other side of the board since there are enough Linux luminaries for it

@BryanLunduke Linus as the King, Stallman as the Queen.
Windows users as the pawns



Would that make Jim Zemlin one of the bishops? all linuxy but moving diagonally across the board

Well I'm imagining a regular chess match, Stallman vs Linus, and a huge crowd of people surrounding them.

And everyone is arguing, suggesting the next move and moving random pieces! The board gets knocked over several times, restarting the game from scratch. Someone's painting the table. Shit's on fire. Mark Shuttleworth is playing checkers by himself in the corner for no fucking reason.

And everyone is having fun... swearing at each other. (^▽^)

@BryanLunduke Stallman would get angry that the white pieces move first

Stallman would definitely be the Queen.
Share the love.

@BryanLunduke you would be the queen, obviously 😘

@BryanLunduke Crowned Penguins as king and queen, geckos as knights, men in fedoras as bishops, minators for rooks, and and xfce mice as pawns

@BryanLunduke Every piece, including the board and the table it's sitting on, is Lennart Poettering.

Whether you wanted it or not.

King - tux (the least helpful piece)
Queen - linus (the most helpful piece)
Knights - daniel j. bernstein, werner koch (cryptoknights)
Bishops - eric s. raymond, richard stallman (the religious)
Rooks - dennis ritchie, donald knuth (the indirectly associated, therefore on the edges of the board)
Pawns - mark shuttleworth (representing the Ubuntu horde)